You take the good, you take the bad, you take them all and there you have: Ted Allen's shoes.

Creativity is the name of the game when I’m cooking. That’s why I’m going to win, no ingredient can throw me.
WTF IS THAT?!?!

Creativity is the name of the game when I’m cooking. That’s why I’m going to win, no ingredient can throw me.

WTF IS THAT?!?!

I Just Want To Be Loved. Is That So Wrong?

"No offense, I just think I’m a far superior chef to my competitor. That’s all."

Translation: “It scares the crap out of me that the judges liked his/her entree dish more than mine. I was so out of the box!!”

Y U no cook the flank steak right? Y U make Chris Santos sad?
(For reference, watch “Drawing a Flank from Season 12 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Chopped_episodes#Season_12_.282012.29)

Y U no cook the flank steak right? Y U make Chris Santos sad?

(For reference, watch “Drawing a Flank from Season 12 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Chopped_episodes#Season_12_.282012.29)

Redefining what it means to be called genius. Lives in fear of getting a wedgie from Chris Santos.

Redefining what it means to be called genius. Lives in fear of getting a wedgie from Chris Santos.

Turn Down the Suck

"Chef, this was a very hard decision."

Translation: “Of everyone who sucked, you sucked the worst.”

What if I told you… “haricots verts” is basically just French for green beans.

What if I told you… “haricots verts” is basically just French for green beans.

We repeat: there is no unspoken tension between Geoffrey Zakarian and Aaron Sanchez. Between Ted Allen’s suit jacket and his shoes, on the other hand…

We repeat: there is no unspoken tension between Geoffrey Zakarian and Aaron Sanchez. Between Ted Allen’s suit jacket and his shoes, on the other hand…

I’m sure Santos won’t have a problem with you jug-a-lugging from that 40 of bourbon and then pouring some into your sauce. I mean, we’re only on national television, right?

I’m sure Santos won’t have a problem with you jug-a-lugging from that 40 of bourbon and then pouring some into your sauce. I mean, we’re only on national television, right?

Fake It Til You Make It

“I just don’t believe in cooking food that way.”

Translation: “I had no f’ing idea what I was doing out there.”